


after all this time

by RosePetalsAndRain



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Crowley is Whipped (Good Omens), Fluff, Getting Together, Humor, M/M, Oblivious Aziraphale (Good Omens), Post-Canon, Romantic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, crowley is both dramatic and vulnerable in this and i think that contrast is sexy and fun, they just love each other very much u know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-12 23:35:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29642427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RosePetalsAndRain/pseuds/RosePetalsAndRain
Summary: Whilst everything made absolutely no sense, it made perfect sense at the exact same time.Aziraphale and Crowley: Angel and Demon.They were polar opposites: they repelled each other in every way, their very existence made their love seem insensible and contradictory. But just like magnets, their differences bound the two together in an inseparable force field; drew them together time and time again.--Or, the soulmate au wherein all your memories WITHOUT your soulmate are dimmed, somehow. Not completely, just like it was darker than usual wherever you were. The ones with your soulmate in them are light and carefree, glowing with happiness and the future ahead of you. All that you have to do is figure out who it was that made the memories glow for you.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 41





	after all this time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gazing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gazing/gifts).



> happy birthday bub!!! ur my grandma now <33 i lov u 
> 
> this au was from an original soulmate concept that i've been sitting on for a while now, waiting for the perfect time to break it out. gia's birthday is by far special enough for it, so I hope that she, and the rest of you, enjoy it just as much as I have enjoyed writing it!

Aziraphale’s mind has always felt  _ dimmed _ . 

But do not mistake his meaning: he’s a very bright angel,  _ remarkably _ so. He absorbs books and the knowledge within them like a sponge absorbs water, and has never had any problem in the academic or communicative departments of his heavenly lifetime. And his lifetime has been  _ long _ .

No, indeed: the point at hand is that all of his  _ memories _ have a kind of dull tinge to them. And this is by no means abnormal:  _ everybody’s _ memories begin with a sort of  _ shade _ , as if one’s mind is wearing sunglasses that they can’t quite shake off. It’s perfectly ordinary, but perhaps Aziraphale’s case can be counted as extraordinary, if anything.

The entire ordeal regarding dimmed memories was the fact that they would only appear brighter when your twin flame, the one you were destined to be with for life, and then find each other again in your next lives and afterlives -- was in the memory with you. And this condition is something that is very much  _ human. _

And Aziraphale is by no means  _ human _ \- not at all. 

Being an Angel, he had never questioned why his memories were so much darker than he remembered living them, and had put it down to normality, never thinking twice about it even once. Everything had been smooth sailing until that fateful day in Eden, wherein he had given away his flaming sword, and met one certain Demon, who would be years thereafter known as Anthony J. Crowley. 

At first, Aziraphale had never thought about it. He’d truly never realised: until then, all of his memories had had the same shady quality to them, and he had presumed, and rightly so, that all memories must have that quality to them, as he had never known any different and, being an Angel, had also assumed that he would not  _ have _ a soulmate. He wasn’t created for that purpose! He was made to serve God, and then put on Earth to make sure that everything went according to the Ineffable Plan - or, as close to it as he could possibly fathom, as - as he liked to remind Crowley daily - they did not know the plan themselves, for it is  _ ineffable, _ after all.

In all fairness, he had stayed blissfully ignorant and unaware of his predicament until a good few centuries after meeting Crowley. He really should have realised sooner, but… when one’s head is so full of heavenly responsibilities, and centuries upon millennia of memories, it can get hard to sort through them all. So when Aziraphale finally has a genuine moment to himself, and finds himself reminiscing on how far himself and Crowley have come so far. It’s only when he smiles as he remembers their first meeting back in Eden, that he realises -- realises that the warmth radiating from his memories isn’t just in the emotional sense. It makes him feel warm, to reflect on the years gone by with a dear friend, but as well as the warmth, there’s a beautiful  _ brightness _ that holds glory and joy within it. 

All at once Aziraphale is overcome with every emotion, and he’s sure that he goes through the five stages of grief within the span of a single second - with the exception of anger. No matter what happens, he has never been able to feel anger towards Crowley - and that realisation in itself hits like a tonne of bricks, how  _ fitting _ it is that although Aziraphale is sure he’s felt every other thing, the anger within his body only ever gives way to softness with just one look back into the breathtaking colour of Crowley’s eyes. They say that the eyes are the window to the soul, and that may be why his memories of Crowley’s eyes are the brightest of them all.

Whilst everything made absolutely no sense, it made perfect sense at the exact same time. 

Aziraphale and Crowley: Angel and Demon. 

They were polar opposites: they repelled each other in every way, their very existence made their love seem insensible and contradictory. But just like magnets, their differences bound the two together in an inseparable force field; drew them together time and time again. 

Their relationship was a blanket; thick and worn from years of wear, yet the feeling only brought more comfort to them; a sense of safety. Each fluorescent stitch was a memory; an aspect that made them who they had become today, and most importantly, it was what held them together. 

It’s always been Crowley. Of course it has. Of  _ course _ the only being in his entire life, who had been there through thick and thin, who had stuck to his side relentlessly - who Aziraphale  _ himself _ had stuck like glue to as much as he could manage - would be his soulmate. Looking back at everything, it makes Aziraphale laugh in exasperation; how stupid he had been for not realising, and then how much  _ sense _ it made. Of course he had never realised until now! Everything was so beautifully natural that it led to no room for questioning.

With shaking hands Aziraphale picks up his telephone, and dials the number to Crowley’s place at lightning speed. As usual, Crowley only picks up on around the fourth ring, by which time Aziraphale is a mess of cold sweat and sharp nerves. 

“Angel?” Crowley mumbles into the receiver, his voice groggy and gravelly. Aziraphale must have woken him from another nap - but he knows that if Crowley had truly intended to sleep undisturbed, he would have ignored the ringtone, or turned his own phone off completely, and so he can’t bring himself to feel guilty for his disturbance. “You okay?”

“Crowley,” Aziraphale whispers, and hopes that the sound will travel coherently. “Crowley, have you… thought about me recently?”

Silence crackles on the line, and then Crowley is laughing in realisation, a huge, hearty laugh that makes the phone vibrate against Aziraphale’s ear, the feeling travelling right down to his own heart and intertwining with it, making a home there, and settling.

“ _ Angel _ ,” Crowley manages once he’s stopped laughing for a second, “Angel… it took a good while for the penny to drop, didn’t it?”

“What do you -- oh,” Aziraphale says stupidly, and his heart drops to his shoes as the implications finally hit him.  _ Oh _ . Crowley has known all along -- whilst Aziraphale has always been one step behind, lagging in oblivion -- until now.

“So, erm… what do you think?” Crowley asks then, and the sudden vulnerability in his voice makes Aziraphale long to be in the same room as him, so that he may hold him close and reassure him better than what feels like a cold comparison over the phone. “Do you think I’m good enough? To deserve you, forever?”

“Oh, Crowley…” Aziraphale breathes, fingers twisting in his phone’s cord, “In the entire of our existence, for each and every one of these years… there’s never been hope for anybody but you.”

It pans out almost like a movie, then, when Crowley immediately announces that he’s coming over to Aziraphale’s bookshop to visit, and when Aziraphale looks back on it that night, his memory bursts with colour and vibrance as soon as Crowley enters, pushing both doors open with his hands - dramatic, as usual, but now that Aziraphale is aware of their situation it brings him even more joy than usual.

“Why hello there,” Crowley murmurs as he draws close to Aziraphale, and in Aziraphale’s post-realising bliss he doesn’t even realise how he is the one to close the distance between them, and pulls Crowley closer by his jacket lapels. 

“My soulmate, after all this time…” Aziraphale whispers, and Crowley tilts his face down just a little, so that their lips ghost over each other as his angel speaks. “After everything we’ve been through… Oh, Crowley, thank you for sticking with me for so long.”

“It’s all in the job description,” Crowley grins, and then Aziraphale is surging forwards: this new initiation of affection from his Demon provides him with all the confidence that he needs to connect their lips. It’s admittedly short, and clumsy, but just as sweet as the strawberries and cream that Crowley had treated him to just last week, and leaves Aziraphale feeling more sated and loved than any meal out from Crowley could ever do. 

They pull away with a small noise of mutual satisfaction, although they don’t step apart, and Crowley loops his arms around Aziraphale’s shoulders to stop him from stepping out of his personal bubble. “Well, Angel, if I’d have known you’d have done  _ that _ once you finally realised, I would have tried to push you to realise  _ much _ sooner.”

“Oh, stop it,” Aziraphale smiles, and despite his words he sounds incredibly pleased as he looks up at Crowley, before averting his eyes shyly. “Well, when did  _ you _ realise? I doubt it was very long before me.”

“On the contrary,” Crowley announced loudly, and Aziraphale was glad that his bookshop was empty, for he didn’t want this moment of basking within each other’s presence to be interrupted by prying eyes or snide comment or even worse, a query regarding one of his precious books. “ _ I _ realised just a few days after the day we met in Eden.” The bragging tone is loud, and obvious, and so very  _ Crowley _ that Aziraphale has to bite back a laugh.

Aziraphale gasps loudly, and pretends to smack Crowley’s chest, indignant. “I refuse to believe you! There’s no perceivable way.”

“There is indeed, and if I could prove it I would,” Crowley says, and Aziraphale feels as though his heart is going to combust.

“Why didn’t you tell me, dear?” he asks quietly, and Crowley shrugs, clearly trying to seem unbothered. “Why be in the know, silently, for centuries upon centuries?”

“We were happy enough without you realising,” Crowley shrugs again, and there’s a slight smile tickling the corners of his mouth as he does so. “And you’ve realised now, haven’t you? We’ve always had all the time in the world. There was never any rush.”

“And now we have the rest of the time in the world to make up for it,” Aziraphale whispers, and Crowley leans down to kiss him again, unable to stop himself.

“Yes we do, Angel. Yes, we do.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading!!!! i hope you enjoyed :DD 
> 
> go wish gia a happy birthday pls <33 
> 
> twt: roseseungs  
> kofi: https://ko-fi.com/rainydays325


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